No matter what HTML editor you are using (Dreamweaver, MS Expression Web, Site Build It, XSitePro, etc.), you still need to learn HTML and basic CSS to understand what is going on behind the scenes. Only then will you know what is really possible, only then will you know why something is "not working as expected," only then will you truly be in control of your Web site. XSitePro has some limitations, yes, but that's because it's not Dreamweaver! Dreamweaver is expensive and hard to learn, it doesn't have wizards and built-in SEO features, and building sites takes much more time, effort and know-how (HTML and CSS again!).
If you really want menus that you have full control over (including using your own rollover images and SEO-friendly CSS menus), you can use AllWebMenus Pro
(my affiliate link) with XSitePro. It works perfectly. But then you will have another learning curve; you will still need to know some HTML and CSS; and you will have to add page links to the menus manually.
Here's a couple of tips for you...
In 90% (at least) of the templates I create for myself and for my clients, I use the XSitePro menu style called Ice Block. I remove the border and change the arrow to one of the smaller, more elegant ones. At that point, the menu is very vanilla, so now I can do a lot with it. I often add my own background image as the menu bar. Then I decide on an attractive combination of the things that Ice Block offers: separator, fonts, font weight, rollover colours, text decoration (underline), etc. It doesn't matter that I use this menu style over and over again, because it looks different on each site and it's exactly like the simple, functional menus used on innumerable professional Web sites.
By the way, you can create your own rollover buttons for the XSitePro default menu styles. You just have to create them the same size as the ones that are already there. Then you have to find the right directory to add them to (e.g., C:\Program Files\XSitePro2\ExampleMenuStyles\Backgrounds\Glass). Note: You might have to do this as Administrator in Windows.